Before I started this journey of learning to get better myself I would nap daily and then have to go to bed early. My daily naps have diminished unless little man would like cuddles in bed with my little pony. (He really is the sweetest) Or when I am on my period, because when I am hormonal and battling my own mind it really is just too much overwhelm for one being.. for the moment.
So where have I got to, the being a vegetarian is something I have given up for now, when I was in my low states it was just so difficult to actually get myself to eat something when I was making something different for the boys.
Do you know what thought, I am not dissapointed, I accept and approve of myself and my decisions, I refuse to continue the cycle of continuously pushing myself too hard and then feeling a failure. Things are what they are and I will from now on choose the easy way to keep in or working towards my happy bubble.
I have made you aware before that I now accept the messages sent to me from the universe. Today was an image that said..
There is a big difference between giving and sacrifice. Giving from a heart that is overflowing feels so good. Sacrificing does not feel good. Don’t confuse the two they are diametrically opposed.
One emits a signal of lack and the other emits a signal of more than enough. One feels good and one does not feel good.
Sacrifice will eventually lead to resentment. Giving from a full heart is one of the most joyous things you can do, and the law of attraction will grab hold of tha signal and flood even more into your life
You can feel the difference.
Wow, yes deep. And also very hard. But it really hit home for me. I make myself so unwell because I am constantly trying to keep others up. I know I myself am sometimes an unintended weight on others and I really massively appreciate the help I get, but how can I seriously think I can help anyone else when I need to work on myself.
I self sabotage myself so much, it is my worst trait. I realise I am starting to feel unwell and instead of working on myself I take on others problems because it seems easier than helping myself. Well this time I am doing things differently. I am taking a step back, I am choosing joy and fun. I am sleeping instead of working. I am cuddling instead of staring at a screen. I am going to visit my friends instead of hiding myself away in my bed. It is hard. But I am determined to learn about myself, I will learn how to deal with emotions, with hormones, with changing my thoughts from a negative contineuum to a more generalised self conversation.
I will get out on walks, I will bathe whilst reading. I will just turn off my screen regardless of where I am with my work and go to the park, watch a film, cuddle or read my book.
I don’t want to burden people with my negativeness, I want to learn to not have it anymore, to focus on the good, be gracious for the amazing and beautiful life I am living, I want my friends to realise that if I am taking a step back it is not only for me but for them too.
I accept my negativities, I realise that they are messages from my emotions. It is okay to feel sad, it is okay to not want to feel sad. I can beat this.
I align myself with a positive but not overbearing attitude, I love myself and all whom are around me, I accept that I am successful and abundant and am waiting for these goodies to arrive. I know that all is done for me and all I need to do is allow the universe to give me what is already set up for me.
I am not my mental health.
I choose me.