Today I woke up and just wanted rest, I wanted quiet and to hide away.
I came down the stairs and made fried bread and beans. I ate it and whilst doing so I sat on my Facebook.
In that moment on Facebook I read a second announcement of a friend now fighting cancer this week. What the fuck is it with cancer!! It’s everywhere. I didn’t want to be an adult anymore.
I asked my friend what she was doing and if she fancied going and sitting at a field we used to sit on as teenagers, she said she had her girls but would come and so I decided to bring my boys.
In that moment I realised I wasn’t going to be glum or to hide away. In that moment I knew I was going to appreciate the sun and enjoy having some fun with my boys.
We got dressed and off we went to my friends. When we arrived her partner and her son had decided to go to the cinema at a later time in the day so her fella played football with the kids for a little while. Went to the shops to get water and left early so they could hit the next showing of Captain America.
It was up and down, Kylan decided at one point he was bored. And what was even more sad is her was really hot and sweaty, he asked if he could take his top off and then refused because he didn’t want to show his FAT belly. W.T.F but that will be another blog post because I have lots to say about this.
It’s crazy how much we hide our bodies. I literally point blank refuse to be negative about my body again and even if I feel it I’m going to make a point to feel confident about it anyway. We are so so lucky to have the bodies we have and it’s such a shame how much we put ourselves down.. even down to our toes! Speaking of putting ourselves down, I actually cannot stand the photo’s of me below, so I am using it in this blog.. because it’s my naked make up less face, my double chin and no eye brows or eyelashes and looking like I have no hair because of the sun and that I am so fair… and I’m doing this because even I need to get over myself too!
I had such a great time at the field. It was very freeing, I took my shoes and socks off and did cartwheels and hand stands on the grass. I then made Carly do the same. She said she hated her feet and had docs and wooly socks on.. It didn’t take me long to get her to let her toes enjoy the wind lol.
Ky played football with some big boys that came over to the field and J and Carly’s Gracie played wizard’s which was too too sweet all whilst Elsie slept in her iCandy.
When we arrived home, Andy had put a yummy beef Sunday dinner on. However he had also eaten my chocolate bar and between him and Ky saying hurtful things I ended up in my room crying. It wasn’t long before I was eating dinner and my chocolate bar had been replaced and Ky wanted cuddles. You gotta love hormones!! So yay.. pretty flower reminder!
After dinner it was time to bath my scruffy little men, you could tell they had had a brilliant day by how much they needed a good bubble bath! I’m making it my mission to get them out and playing more without technology. It will help me too.
They went to bed quite nicely. I’m starting an exciting Princes Trust course tomorrow eeeeppp.. big steps to a big dream so I checked that everything is prepared for Uncle Faz who will be helping me with the boys tomorrow. I have washed the clothes I want to wear and they are now in the dryer.
It is now 10pm, I really know I need to have an early night tonight. Andy keeps messaging me to get in the bath but I feel so so tired.
Life is about taking on the randomness and accepting the fun.
All my love to you Petals x