I am retiring from today and this week. This week has been tough, seeing the assessor, decorating Faz’s flat. Jaden breaking his wrist, going to London on my own and back, far far too much waiting patiently impatiently in waiting rooms. I’ve done too much, been too much, felt too much. I’m overloaded with information and emotion and my body is now telling me it is time to give in and allow some healing within.
I am typing this from my bed, eating a tip top and covered in freeze gel and knowing that even though it is only half 4 in the afternoon I am likely to be asleep soon.
This week has been an amazing challenge, I have learnt so much about myself and own new parts of my illness. I have spoken openly to a group of lovely new ladies I had met about my depression and anxiety. About I write about coping with this new life that I am now owning.
I have decided that rather than keep struggling to walk that I am going to get a walking stick! Then I can handle myself keeping myself moving rather than struggling. And that it is okay, I will be buying a pretty one and healing myself one step at a time.
And now I am learning that it is okay not to feel okay, that I can and should allow myself to rest and recover. And if I give myself this special time to recharge I can empower myself in this new week even more.
Today we had J’s assessment and the splint is working so in 3 weeks he will be fully healed. I came home to a house full of family, the living room tidy and dinner on. I sat down and I am aching. My body today is telling me that enough is enough and I need to rest.
In this new week, I hope to eat well, eat healthier and fill myself with nutritious goodies. I would like to have some downtime as a family, maybe painting or doing something creative together. I would also like to give myself more time to read and to sit in quiet as it is in this space (Other than the bath or shower) I get my best ideas.
In this present time, I am retiring from today, and from this week. This week has presented me with a lot and I am grateful. I need my energy cleanse, my deep sleep to recharge my soul to be ready and excited for this new week.
Our lives are in the palm of our hands! Trust in yourself. Love you all, Magic people! <3